“…This year was honestly life changing. I am glad it is over…”
Before I revamp my Blog and breathe much needed life into it again, I decided it was a good time to sit down and put 2016 into words. It has definitely been a year I am glad to see the back of, and I am not usually one to say that. Most years, whatever has happened I try to turn it around the next year, making everything as positive as I could. However, 2016 brought all sorts of challenges that I personally didn’t cope with as well as I would have liked.
The year itself centered around me and my mental health. I battled with depression and anxiety from February until December. Multiple things had got me down to this stage, and at first, I didn’t accept that I was depressed, however, the more I thought about my actions I realised something was right. I am not proud of the fact I allowed a situation, and person, in my previous job to bring me down to the floor the way she did, however, it has taught me some very good lessons; I am strong, I am able and it is okay to look after number one. It also taught me just who your friends really are, and that is one thing I know will carry into 2017. A few friends didn’t understand my depression, nor were they willing to weather the storms with me, and although it hurts me to say it, I cannot be doing with it anymore.
I also left my job in December, due to my health, and a few work factors. It was a big decision for me, as I have worked with the company five years and all in all I enjoyed my job. As my depression was coming to a close, I soon realised that I was worrying every day about work, I was having panic attacks on my way there and sometimes on my breaks. I could see that the person who started my depression had affected my confidence, and without my confidence, I was beginning to fail. No matter what I tried, or my managers and colleagues tried to help me, it just wasn’t working anymore. I had given up, sadly. A few people understood and had actually left the company themselves due to stress, but some I thought would understand were cool with me, even on my leaving day; We’ll have to see where things go.
My relationship suffered with my boyfriend, David. It was very hard for him to understand my depression, and the way I was acting for a very long while. We went through so many arguments and talks about maybe going our separate ways, and yet he stayed beside me and we worked it all out. I am so thankful for all his determination for us to work as a couple, and I can honestly say it has made his stronger together. I am hoping 2017 allows us to catch up on all the fun and adventures we missed out on our first year of living together after closing our LDR in 2015.
I guess not everything was doom and gloom.. we attended two weddings of friends in June and October, my best friend had a baby daughter in May, David and I signed another year of our lease back in June and things between Mum and I have got better. We have had some nice trips back to my childhood home, we’ve been to many sessions of Bingo, plenty of coffee dates and pizza nights, we rekindled friendships with some of David’s friends, we got a PS4 Pro and I was able to hone my skills in Crochet.
All in all, 2016 was definitely a learning curve in my life, and now that we enter 2017 and my 30th year of being alive, I know this year I want to do so much more. I want to read more, drink more tea, sleep more, crochet more, travel more, cuddle more, lose weight, take more pictures, make more memories, cook more. see new sights and try new things. I guess nothing there is different or spectacular, but they are on my ‘to-do’ list, and hopefully I will be more motivated to achieve them!
Goodbye 2016 and Hello 2017
Let’s make it my year